Moments of heartbreak

This morning LC said, "Mommy? I wish I had a lucky pebble because if you have a lucky pebble you can make a wish."

"Uh huh," wondering what LC would wish for.

"If I had a lucky pebble I would wish Boomer better."

"Oh sweetie. That is so nice. I wish you could."

I'm taking Boomer to the vet at 2:20pm today. I cried as I booked the appointment and she walked me through the procedure. Then I went to the library to find books for kids about dying pets. A helpful librarian found a few good books, including a very good one about a girl's cat who dies. I sat there reading books and crying. I'm really worried that LC is going to be mad because he didn't get to say goodbye. He did see Boomer this morning and talked to him for a minute and petted him. But I didn't know for sure that today was Boomer's last day. And I'm a wimp.

A couple of months ago, before we knew how sick Boomer was, we were admonishing LC to be gentle with Boomer, since he had lost weight and appeared to be getting a little frail. LC cheerfully observed, "Boomer keeps getting smaller and smaller. Soon he's going to be a kitten!"

Oh honey. If only it worked that way.